About Abuse

The Outer Banks Hotline offers housing and services for individuals, children and families experiencing domestic violence.  A team of trained professionals works with each client to provide support and advocacy to break the cycle of abuse.

What is Domestic Violence?

Domestic Violence is more than physical violence. Ending the harm and stigma of domestic violence requires understanding of the behaviors that define it, as well as examples of healthy relationships, to inform your interactions and decisions moving forward. Our advocates are available 24/7 to discuss your situation and help determine if your relationship might be abusive.

Domestic violence, also referred to as intimate partner violence (IPV), dating abuse or relationship abuse, is a pattern of behaviors by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship. Domestic violence doesn’t discriminate.  People of any age, race, gender, sexuality, religion. education level or economic status can be a victim or perpetrator of domestic violence. That includes behaviors that physically harm, intimidate, manipulate or control a partner, or otherwise force them to behave in ways they don’t want to, including through physical violence, threats, emotional abuse or financial control. Abusers may also control victims through economic abuse, isolation, coercion or threats against the victim’s children or pets. Stalking and controlling behavior through technology are other common forms of violence.  Many victims fear the unknowns of what may happen if they leave their abuser.

In abusive situations, multiple forms of abuse are usually present at the same time and to know what to look for you need to understand how these forms of abuse intertwine. When we know what a relationship looks like and means, we can take steps to get help for ourselves as well as better supporting others.

Are you being abused or at risk for abuse?

Please review the questions below.  If you answer "YES" to three or more of these questions, you could be in danger in the future.  Without effective intervention, abuse can and usually does escalate in severity.  Sometimes abuse leads to homicide. If you believe you could be in danger, please call Hotline at 252-473-5121. We can guide you to the options that are right for you and your situation. 

• Makes you feel uncomfortable or afraid?
• Uses force during an argument?
• Often put you down, humiliate you or make you feel worthless?
• Constantly checks up on what you are doing or where you are going?
• Tries to isolate you from your friends or family?
• Is usually jealous or hypersensitive?
• Blames others for their feelings?
• Makes you feel afraid to disagree or say “no” to them?
• Tells you how the household finances should be spent or stops you from having any money yourself?
• Threatens to leave you and take your children away?
• Makes all the decisions, tells you what to wear and who you can talk to?
• Has shoved, pushed, pinched or bitten you?
• Throws things, hits walls or breaks objects?
• Uses force during sex or makes you to do sexual things that you don’t want to do?
• Threatens to hurt you, your family, friends or pets?
• Threatens to hurt themselves if you say you want to end the relationship?
• Has a history of bad relationships?
• Have your family or friends expressed concern for your safety?

Do these traits sound like your partner? If so, please beware. These indicate a strong potential for abuse in your relationship. 

Outer Banks Hotline can help. Call our 24/7 HELP LINE 252-473-3366. It is important to know that your call is confidential and you can choose to remain anonymous when speaking with an advocate.  To know what to expect when calling, read this article.